@archerenemy: Jackpot is like regular pot, but with a questionable added ingredient...
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@dundlewood: I didn't think there'd be a sequel for "To Kill A Mockingbird." I just assumed that they all lived Harper Lee ever after
@AbbyHasIssues: The good news is it wasn't a bug. The bad news is I beat the crap out of a black bean on the floor with my shoe.
@Phook75: If Thomas Jefferson was alive today people would scream "What the hell? You're almost 300 years old!"
@matsmoustache: You walk into my bedroom... I'm laying naked with a platter of nachos on my chest. You get punched while trying to take some of my nachos.