@NurseSeymour: Jamie on FB just took a quiz to find out what type of flower she is. She's a vibrant poppy. Weird, all this time I thought she was human.
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@NYC_Blonde: I recognize that Rome wasn't built in a day but I'm not trying to build Rome, I just want to to enjoy onion rings without gaining weight.
@BrainFumbles: "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, & nothing but the tru-" I choose dare, your honor "Bailiff, please hi-five the defendant"
@Frankie_Val: Gay men aren't fags. Guys who do 70mph, on a suburban side street, in their second-rate sports cars are fags.
@kerihw: Birds do it. Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it. Let's do it. Let's fly into a window.