@MrLloydSpandex: Japan's flag is like a pie chart of how much of Japan is Japan.
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@TheToddWilliams: My doctor won't go away. I know what you're thinking but he has been eating small pieces of apple over many decades to build up an immunity.
@juliussharpe: My wife wants to have another kid. That's like seeing light at the end of a tunnel and saying, "I think we better turn around."
@clemdytan: My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy...so I came back drunk.