@VerifiedDrunk: Jesus is all like eat my body, drink my blood and I'm all like dude, I only like you as a friend.
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@CranalBeads: just when my neighbors think they know me, I sprint across their yard pushing a wheelbarrow full of hair
@einsteinsexual: Stereotypes are just like regular types, except every time someone almost kills me, while I'm driving, it's an Asian person.
@Daniel_Sloss: If anyone says YOLO to me I say YOLBYPCFAC (You Only Live Because Your Parents Couldn't Find A Condom). I hope it catches on...