@curlycomedy: Jesus said to love your neighbor, but makes no mention about putting up with their music at 3am.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ArfMeasures: MURDERER: [looking for me] You better of hidden well or you're dead ME: [under bed, tears in my eyes] It's better HAVE
@mobydong: Wearing a wig is probably worth the hassle for those moments when you get to dramatically pull it off your weary, tearful head.
@DirtMcTurd: I took my family out to an authentic Chinese restaurant. My wife and I had chow mein and my daughter built 3 iPhones
@FadeAway2: Ever notice when you need to delete a phone app and you get the icons jiggling? They seem all panicky about who's getting cut from the team