@TheTweetOfGod: Jesus was white and spoke English and enjoyed baseball and apple pie and was a churchgoing Christian.
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@YearOfRat: My vocabulary can beat your vocabulary's ass, arse, bum, buttocks, rear end, booty, backside, tush, tuckus and badonkadonk.
@disco_bird: For 10 years I believed my best friend was a mute, but it turns out that someone has just drawn a boy in the corner of my glasses.
@OutOfLeftField_: Sent my ex a card that said, "Get better soon." He's not ill, just really crap in bed.