@peteec: Jim Lehrer is moderating this debate with the skill of an NFL replacement referee.
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@jonnysun: 5 lil monkeys jumping on the bed one fell off & bumped his head called the doctor & the doctor said U DO NOT HAVE A PERMIT FOR THESE ANIMALS
@DumbConfessions: *sees couple holding hands* *violently breaks them apart* "Go. You're free now."
@TheAlexNevil: It's kind of annoying that my wife said something about glistening but when I asked her to repeat it she just got mad.
@slimmy_shady: "More people are killed by toasters than sharks". So if you're swimming in the ocean and see a toaster, you're in big trouble.