@Elizasoul80: Johnny Depp is the best actor ever. You can't even tell he has scissor hands in Pirates of the Caribbean.
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@jwoodham: DATING TIP: Pick up the check. Pick up the table. Pick up the chairs and the waitress and the bartender. Everyone loves upper body strength.
@AristotlesNZ: Hey! I took my diaper off, see? Oh! Look! I found your power drill! Gonna go see if it fits an outlet.. Bye! -My 2yo when I'm on the toilet
@ibid78: "Pick a pencil. Look at it. Now put it back with the other pencils. Was your pencil the number 2?"-Steve, shitty pencil magician