@Elizasoul80: Johnny Depp is the best actor ever. You can't even tell he has scissor hands in Pirates of the Caribbean.
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@bakedbrotatoes: -You talkin to my girl? *pops knuckles* -What if I am? *cracks neck* *dislocates shoulder* *breaks collarbone* *fractures skull*
@FeelingMervis: UGH. When I text girls that I have standards, I really need to stop abbreviating the word standards to STDs.
@jergarl: [At gang interview] GangLeader: You wanna be in our gang Me: Yep GL: What qualities do you.. M: *Already snapping fingers GL: You're in