@Colleen1913: Johnny Depps wife filed for divorce, thanks a lot Australia! This is why nice people don't visit you!
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@StarWarsProblms: Yoda: In the Light Side, the real power is. Luke: The Emperor controls the galaxy. You live in a swamp.
@JermHimselfish: My doctor told me my testosterone level was unusually high. At least that's what I think he said, I could hardly hear him over the chainsaw.
@Marlebean: Hostess:There's a 45 min wait Me:Do you know who I am? I have THOUSANDS of followers! H:Let me ask my manager *2 min later H:It'll be 43 min
@Matt_the_1st: Cop: do you know why I pulled u over? Me: yeah, I was going like 120 back there Cop:.... Me:.. Cop: sir, your tailamp is out Me:...