@SortaBad: Jokes on you TSA my body is 70% water and I just snuck it onto the plane
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jaimekessel: Instead of a flower girl, I want a parmesan boy to sprinkle cheese down the aisle at my wedding
@urfavoritejoel: Finally got this fire hydrant open, but there was like, the opposite of fire inside
@TheTweetOfGod: When the devil buys your soul he makes you sign a contract because even though he is pure evil he has an unshakable respect for tort law.
@therealeatwood: [Ouija Board] Me: Spirit, answer this one question—do you like me? Board: R E A D 1 2 : 3 7 P M