@kibblesmith: Jon if Garfield is too fat maybe stop purchasing ingredients and cooking full lasagnas for him you realize that's dinner for a human family
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@LackOfShame: Server: Would you like another glass of wine? Me: I'm sorry, I don't have time Server: For the wine? Me: No, for silly questions
@KeetPotato: japanese chef: "we need a name for our sauce" me: "what about Keithyaki? haha" my friend Teri: "i have a much better idea"