@donsengstack: Jurassic Park 7: Nothing goes wrong and everyone just genuinely enjoys the company of the dinosaurs
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@RedBeard3000: Officer: have you been drinking? Me: no sir 0: you were swerving M: Twitter O: oh, I'm on Twitter what's your handle M: yes, I was drinking
@Sassafrantz: Being possessed would be cool because you could turn your head all the way around to say "wrong hole"
@panmidwest: ME: [walking down the street clearly counting with my fingers] WIFE: you could just- ME: I'm not paying for another Fitbit, Jenn