@bourgeoisalien: Just accidentally messaged my husband "love you sexy beats" instead of "sexy beast" and now he thinks he’s some sort of DJ.
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@jonnysun: *the force awakens* *the dark knight rises* *they make eye with eachother adn realize they were sleepig in the same bed* AHHHHHHHHHHHH
@xLiserx: *First Date* Him: You've been really quiet. Everything ok? Me: *Sadly* Your SnapChat photos made me think you were a super intelligent dog.
@batkaren: Whenever I see WHOA spelled as WOAH, I assume it's referring to Noah's evil twin whose Ark housed all the insect and arachnid life.