@GrumpyBahr: Just ate at a Japanese restaurant and the entire staff was Hispanic. I don't know what is real anymore!
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@WineMummy: Sorry I had sex with your hot gardener, but in my defense, you did say that I needed Jesus in me.
@KentWGraham: For parents, college is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you or they’ll send your kid back.
@runawaycupcake: "We're not buying another toy until Mommy gets laid!" might not be the most appropriate thing to yell in ToysRUs.