@Sassafrantz: Just ate my last pair of edible undies, I guess it's time to get groceries.
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@lakeanagirl: I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the crap out of me. That's it. No more reading!
@Jandalize: Horrifically awaiting the day all the shampoo bottles in my shower decide to squeeze me back.
@WilliamAder: Every year on Valentine's Day, I put a smile on my wife's face by taking down the Christmas tree.
@Mr_Kapowski: 7 y/o daughter: Why don't they have tape for your burrito but you could eat the tape? And now I know what Einstein's parents felt like