@Cheeseboy22: Just found a hilarious message in a bottle on the beach. I decided it needed to be RT'd, so I threw it back in.
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@adilansari: Just got a job opening demanding 13-18 yrs of experience in iOS development. Do they realize that the platform itself is 8 years old?
@Sanbel11: Police officer: Have you had anything to drink? Me:No PO:Ok, blow into here Me:But there are no candles PO:Ma'am please get out of the car
@CoreyNotKori: My handwriting has slowly morphed from cheerleader to serial killer to elephant with a paint brush.