@Donna_McCoy: Just go ahead and put "She always had to pee" on my tombstone, because that's how everyone's going to remember me.
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@ashmensch: Ambien: Remember the time we picked a fight with Gary's garden gnome, chugged a jar of mayonnaise & passed out naked in Arby's parking lot?
@elle91: Me: God, I just feel so Brain: HUNGRY M: No, I'm very alone. I desperately want B: FOOD M: Part of me is missing. All I need is B: PRINGLES
@SadMeterologist: TRUTHFUL TUESDAY: When my son was 7 he pissed me off so badly I pressed all the elevator buttons knowing every new rider would blame him.