@KentWGraham: Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.
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@GlazerBooHooHoo: To trick people into thinking I understand things at a museum I stand in front of every painting and silently count to twenty.
@NervousJr: There's awkward, and then there's listening to a man try to have a conversation with his hairdresser.
@edgarrants: Telling my wife I'm taking her someplace fancy is my way of getting 4 hours to myself while she gets ready.
@tastefactory: BLIND DATE TIP FOR WOMEN: Throw a fork into the wall behind ur date so he has to turn around, to make sure he doesn't have a hidden ponytail