@CaseyMichelle__: Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn't doing his part of the chores around here
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@tastefactory: [turns to date during movie where bank robbers laugh & toss money around motel room] They won't be laughing when it's time to pick it all up
@ErrenMichaels: Superman: I am an all powerful alien with only one weakness. Batman: Is it bats? Please say bats.
@TweetPotato314: Date: do you wanna come up for coffee? Me: no thanks. I hate stairs Date: coffee means sex Me: how many stairs?
@Pork_Chop_Hair: Getting older means having to put a daily stop to the romance between my left and right eyebrows before they become One.