@noog: Just heard a little boy call his mom "mother," as if both had already accepted the fact that he'd become a serial killer some day.
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@BoyfriendWhat: Him: "Can we have a Doritos themed wedding?" Me: "no." Him: "well, what kind of chips would you prefer?"
@TheDizzyBeauty: When I'm texting, I start typing faster when i see you're typing too. Oh, IT'S ON!! #amazingrace
@rolldiggity: Dog Walking Business Idea: 1. Train every dog to walk another dog. 2. Put the dogs in a dog walking circle. 3. GO TO A MOVIE!
@mattgallo123: <job interview> It says here on your resume that you are a "self-proclaimed man of few words." Would you like to elaborate on that? Me: no