@SamuelHLowe: Just how hairy was the dude who invented a shampoo called Head & Shoulders?
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@T_Bonezzz_: My sister let me borrow her newborn baby so I could meet girls at the mall. Worked great! Also, If you've found my nephew Jake, lemme know
@AristotlesNZ: Boss: Project's way behind. Suggestions? I'm willing to try anything. Me: *raises hand* Him: Anything but "helper monkeys" Me: *lowers hand*
@AnOrangeSNES: "You killed a dude I hate your attitude That's why you're going to jail, Without bail 25 to life Bubba is your new wife." -Poetic Justice
@melgabored: BIDEN (whispering) Barack. Psst, Barack. Barack, turn around. OBAMA Joe, I'm a little busy. BIDEN I love you.