@ImAlexOliver: Just installed an egg cannon on the hood of my car. Flipping people off and cursing at them just doesn't satisfy me anymore.
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@jkrambles: It's not God I dislike, He's cool. it's certain members of his fanclub that rub me the wrong way.
@sixfootcandy: I filled my brother's shampoo bottle with olive oil and glitter last night. Have a great day in court, counselor!
@heymonroe: Fun Prank: 1.) Buy 35 coats 2.) Goto the movie theatre 3.) Put a coat on every chair in the row 4.) Relax