@timdonakowski: Just lean back in your chair and say "caloric". It's exhilerating.
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@SteveSuckington: "What if I tried to put a ball somewhere and you tried to stop me" -guy who invented sports
@RobDenBleyker: This Independence Day please remember that fireworks are not a toy, they are meant to be aimed at the nearest British ship.
@krisv_723: Me: Siri, how hot does fire need to be to burn a body. Siri: Kris, we go over this once a week. Make a note.