@Kayditty: Just left WalMart. All the cute well behaved kids must be at Target.
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@Love_bug1016: If only the workout your thumbs get from scrolling on your phone would go to your abs.
@behindyourback: even worse than arguing with a stupid person online is when an even stupider person joins in but they're on your side
@OBiiieeee: my last girlfriend broke up wth me after she went through my phone and i refused to tell her why i searched for goth grandpas
@hippieswordfish: 'welcome to subway how can i-' ME:*punches counter*WHY DOES THE KOOL-AID MAN CARRY A SMALLER PITCHER OF KOOL-AID 'sir-' M: IS IT HIS PISS