@SavoirFail: Just ONCE, I'd like took deep into your beautiful eyes, and make hot sweet love with you without some pop-up window ruining the mood.
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@Tommytoughstuff: "Let's check in with Ted our correspondent in the field." Ted: "Hey Bob I've been in this field for about an hour, and I'm super bored."
@SharkJelly: [At Adele Concert] Adele: Hello from the other siiiiiide Me (shouting): Tell us your surname
@onelongbender: When my boss is in town, I set out pictures of kids on my desk. They aren't my kids but he'd never fire a Mom of seven, right?
@BMcCarthy32: if one member of the motorcycle gang has to pee do they all stop or does he just have to catch back up?