@T_Bonezzz: Just one time I wanna see The Bachelor get a cold sore
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@thezachmaginnis: My sister told me to "take the spider out" instead of "kill" it. So we went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a lawyer.
@markleggett: I tried to take a photo of a huge bug in my bathroom, but when I put a coin next to it for scale IT TOOK THE COIN AND PUT IT IN ITS WALLET.
@VodkaThursday: When her friend visits, my 2yr old just wants to hug her a lot... & keep her away from the toys. I feel that way about my friends & my vodka
@FeelingEuphoric: villain: ironic that the one who shot you is your English professor! me *dying*: actually it's coincidental v *tearing up*: ...you passed