@ShawnIzadi: Just overheard a guy say he was buying a MacBook so he doesn't have to worry about the Ebola virus. What.
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@JohnMayer: I understand that t-shirt guns exist but what about shooting pants at people? This seems useful too
@AlyssaDiSalle: Do something nice for your ex today, take them out. One bullet should do the trick.
@fro_vo: [beach] Me: if a shark stops moving it will die Wife: for the last time you can't kill a shark with a stop sign Me: it's the law diane
@BeamishBoi: That 0.1% of bacteria that no household product can kill is what will inherit our earth