@Tmoney68: Just overheard someone say they need an "escape goat" for their project & I can't decide if they're a complete idiot or an evil genius.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Jenny4ashley: "..so that's the story of Christmas. Questions?" Where do turtledoves come from? "Well, when a turtle and a dove really love each other.."
@rad_milk: I dropped a piece of cheese on the airplane and i know it rolled forward and some piece of shit in first class is enjoying it now
@autocorrects: Do I turn left when nothing is right? Or do I turn right when there's nothing left?