@CaptainObtuse: Just printed out 50 copies of today's weather forecast to carry around with me today because I'm just not in the mood for small talk.
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@TheMichaelRock: Clark Kent: *sits glasses on counter* Lois Lane: Who are you and where did the new countertop come from?
@jackiembouvier: I talk like a sailor in front of my kid. He's gonna swear anyway and I want him to be good at it.
@somecleverthing: Plagiarism is bad? Change a few words, that shit is yours. It's like when you change a baby's clothes- new baby. New baby that's yours now.