@Bizarro_Mark: Just said, "Because I said so!," and my mom called demanding her royalty check.
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@Storminika: Me: 'Why are you going through my phone?' BF: 'Do you have something to hide?' Me: 'I'm gonna have a body to hide if you keep it up.'
@ruinedpicnic: Neil Armstrong: now where did I park my car? [presses key button] [tiny orange light flashes on the moon] god dammit
@SatansTongue: (Macbeth and lady Macbeth) "I killed King Duncan" Macbeth wtf!! "You told me to!!" I didn't think you'd do it omg lmao savage