@MartaEffing: Just saw a five year old in a track suit & a gold chain. His nana didn't think it was funny when I asked him if he could hook up some blow.
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@splegge: Raw eggs are great for a fitness diet. If you don't like the taste, just add sugar, flour, cocoa and baking powder and bake for 30 minutes.
@No_Job_Joe: My boss just fired me because I spent the past 45 minutes taking a crap. I don't see why he can't just clean it off his desk, and move on.
@Book_Krazy: Me: Bless me father for I have sinned... Priest texting me back: I already told you, I'm not absolving u of your sins unless you come in.