Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

@JordyHamrick: Just saw a homeless woman try to use a cat as a telephone. She accepted a cigarette in exchange for the cat. Cat is my telephone now.

Just saw a homeless woman try to use a cat as a telephone. She accepted a cigarette in exchange for the cat. Cat is my telephone now.
1 comments

COMMENTS

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE

@Aspersioncast: So what do you pack for the end of the world? I'm thinking lots of toilet paper, oh and guns to protect my toilet paper.

79

@TwoSapphiresBlu: I crave feet in the sand, a gentle ocean breeze, the sun on my face, and two entirely new presidential candidates.

1

@Diversion50: "Open Mike Night" sounded like a lot of fun until I realised I'd been invited to an autopsy.

1

@Ristolable: 100% of car accidents happen within exactly five miles of something. If you're within five miles of anything right now, move.

131

@Calliejacobson: So apparently in a job interview, if the interviewer asks you to choose one word that describes you, the correct answer is not fergalicious.

251
↑