@BruceForce: Just saw a horse drawn cart. Wasn't a very good cart. Horses are terrible artists.
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@Nuwaha17: I quit drinking & people laughed at me. Now the iPhone 7 is here and I get to sell a clean & pure Liver. The joke is now on them.
@EndhooS: Surgeon: I'll be taking out your appendix today Me: [stomach rumbles] Surgeon: [puts stethoscope to my tummy] Appendix: I have a boyfriend
@BassoonJokes: The holidays are coming. If you do NOT want snakes please send me a notarized letter asking for NO SNAKES. Otherwise you are getting snakes.
@bidenandobama: Biden: Think about it like an investment opportunity. Obama: I'm not buying you an above ground pool, Joe.