@LoveNLunchmeat: Just signed up for free HBO, but the terms and conditions were so steep I think I also agreed to carry Steve Buscemi's baby.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jon_albo: Age is just a number? I stole $100 from your wallet and replaced it with a $5. Don't worry, they're just numbers.
@JimmerThatisAll: I had a friend named Nigel but after you've introduced him a few times the novelty wears off.
@TheMichaelRock: If you surround your house in police tape, the odds of you being robbed drops dramatically.
@BeamishBoi: That 0.1% of bacteria that no household product can kill is what will inherit our earth