@Dishy2101: Just stepped on the scale. Now I have to replace a broken window and add $467 to the curse word jar.
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@jordan_stratton: Remember--the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your appearance, lack of talent, and general personality.
@dubstep4dads: Me: this is bullshit. conditioner and shampoo in one? impossible Walmart employee who I have in a headlock: sir I didn't make the shampoo
@david8hughes: [the last supper] Waiter: ok, your bill comes to 30 pieces of silver Judas: I got this