@DamienFahey: Just used the holiday card with your kid's face on it to scoop up a dog turd in the living room.
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@TheBoydP: If you get nervous when the IT support desk takes control of your computer remember they're whispering "no weirdos please" to themselves.
@Ristolable: I had a teacher in high school who always assumed we'd give the wrong answer. "What's hotter, green or red peppers?" Green "Nope. Green."
@david8hughes: Our family summer boat trips haven't been the same since grandad died & demanded we bury him at sea. In the boat.