@SardonicTart: Just vacuumed my couch and found 16 bobby pins, 84 cents, 3 kinds of cereal, a spoon and a live hedgehog.
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@moxieblogger: If you want to know how Irish my family is, my parents don't have a liquor cabinet, they have a liquor closet Right next to the beer fridge
@JONOCOYOTE: •a lion stalks a fawn• •a man steps out from behind tree• I'm Chris Hansen from NBCs to catch a predator, do u know how old that deer is?
@this503girl: Recently found out I'm not the devil. I read the tag on my underpants incorrectly; it said "Satin". Oops.
@WetzelGeek: The washing machine broke so I had to wash my undies in the river. As a bonus, 3 catfish floated to the top afterwards, so dinner is served!