@SeeEllVee: Just watched a guy walk out of the tanning place and immediately light a cigarette. Slow down, buddy. Don't get all the cancer today!
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@apollilaire: hello id like a reservation for two. also what is yr policy on cats. i wanna bring like seven cats. ive practiced fitting them on one chair
@TheTweetOfGod: The Vatican just deleted all the Pope's tweets. Because NO ONE denies reality like the Catholic Church.
@seriouslyemily: This girls skirt is so short I can see how many times her dad missed a dance recital from here.
@Bagyants: Hang in there, people suffering from natural disasters and deadly diseases - we're putting ribbons on our cars as fast as we can