@kolchak: Justin Bieber songs are much more enjoyable when you replace the word "girl" with "gerbil".
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@unravelingfire: Me: Do you like children? Him: Yes, I love them. Me: Good, because I become a huge child when I drink.
@UncleDuke1969: [mall] Me: That guy looks SO familiar! Wife: … M: Maybe an actor? Musician? W: … M: I’ll get an autograph! W: He’s our mailman, moron.
@krustythe_klown: A bum gets on a bus and walks past a nun. The nun says "youre going to hell". The bum yells "Damn, Im on the wrong bus" ! :D
@partlyfunny: My 11 yo noticed my receding hairline and thought it was hilarious. Until I explained how heredity works.