@CountOnVic: Kanye deleted all the slander like we didn't have an hour to grab screenshots and make power point presentations
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@MatCro: Me: "Aw, your baby is cute. How old?" Woman: "Thanks, she's 34 weeks. Do you have the time?" Me: "Sure, it's 972 minutes past midnight."
@eyeswidebutt: did you write "call Gary in HR for lots of really disappointing and hairy sex" on the bathroom stall? [wearing my "I hate gary" tshirt]: no
@heatherlou_: A "good parenting" blog followed me. Should I let them know how long ago that ship sailed?