@MikalBershawn: *Kanye trips and falls* SUCH A GENIUS! WHAT A POETIC DEMONSTRATION OF HOW HIS ANCESTORS FELL TO SLAVERY AND ROSE AGAIN *jaden smith cries*
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@IamEnidColeslaw: may your fathers prosper. may your friends be uglier than you. may your exes get food poisoning
@KyleMcDowell86: [Me to the second baseman after I slide into 2nd] Make sure u separate plastics & food waste [Coach from dugout] NOT THAT KIND OF TRASH TALK
@jackiembouvier: I talk like a sailor in front of my kid. He's gonna swear anyway and I want him to be good at it.