@BuckyIsotope: Kanye West builds a time machine so he can interrupt himself interrupting Taylor Swift.
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@theDanLawler: New rule: advertisements can no longer use adjectives. I'll decide what is "fresh" and "natural" and "like a real girl" thank you very much
@ojedge: Mobster: [tying a cinder block to my ankles] "You're gonna be sleeping with the fishes…" Me: "Umm, it's 'fish'." M: "This. This is why."