@AnitaHelmet: My husband hasn't forgiven me for answering 'Okie dokie artichokie' instead of utilizing the more socially acceptable phrase, "I do."
@IGotsSmarts: Edgar Allan Poe Because Edgar Allan Got No Job
@robfee: Sorry pregnant ladies, all of your 3D ultrasounds look like Gollum in an Ikea lampshade.
@david8hughes: Wife: don't forget to pick the kids up from school
Me: it's Saturday, they're both upstairs
Wife: it's Wednesday & we have 3 kids
@Pro_Jones_: Dad: Your grandpa used to cut the grass before he died, but now he's-
Son: Dad please don't...
Dad: Lawn gone.
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