@CelebrityChez: Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, your pets in tupperware, your grandad in a crockpot and your mother in law in a ziplock bag.
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@StarksWeek: You can tell Tim Horton's is a Canadian franchise, because my donut just apologized for making me fat.
@mintchevette: Haven't heard from my boyfriend in 3 days. Trying to start a prayer chain. He blocked me after I set up a wedding website so please RT.
@noog: Everyone’s all worried about World War III. Worry about the important shit. Batman’s fighting Superman in 2016.