@tnylgn: Keeping tic-tacs in your pocket lets people know you're more embarrassed of your breath than you are of sounding like a human maraca
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@Dani_Feld: That's it. The next time a relative asks me if I have a boyfriend, I'm going to say "no, I'm just sleeping around".
@panmidwest: [First Date] ME: I prepared some questions to get to know you HER: Ok! ME: What's the capital of Honduras? HER: um… ME:[writing] bad at geo-
@Reverend_Scott: Love is that feeling you get when you meet that special someone who hates all of your friends.