@funnybeachgirl: Kegels: because how else are you supposed to grind fresh coffee beans during a power outage?
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@SCbchbum: Overheard a teenager watching Armageddon for the 1st time (after Bruce Willis blows up): "lol at least the hot one lived (Ben Affleck)."
@KeetPotato: [lightbulb store] owner: "what watt can i get you?" me: owner: me: owner: "did i stutter?" me: "i dont know"
@GrantTanaka: When someone asks me how my day is, I like to say "Still kinda pissed about Hiroshima," & then start swearing in Japanese.