@LittleHarmonica: Kids are like bears. If you play dead eventually they'll leave you alone.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@moose_chocolate: This morning I waved to the garbage men and smiled at coworkers in the elevator and now I'm pretty sure my wife is drugging my coffee.
@TheBeerGuy73: *goes to the gym* *takes a selfie & posts it on Facebook for the wife to see* *hurries to the bar*
@MyPornKhan: I'm guessing the person who decided how to spell "queue" and "okay" got paid by the letter.