@DanLaMorte: Kids here's a tip. Next Christmas leave Santa marijuana cookies and watch how happy your parents magically become the next morning
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@secondofhername: OMG THIS IS SUCH A SURPRISE THE THOUGHT OF WINNING AFTER A NOMINATION IS A PHENOMENA THAT BLOWS MY MIND HOW DID IT HAPPEN - All Emmy winners
@proEXgirlfriend: Telling people to ban same sex marriage cuz of your religion is like telling the supermarket to stop selling junk food cuz you're on a diet.
@_GrahamPatrick: LIAM NEESON: I have a peculiar set of skills. ME: I think the line is 'particular'. LIAM NEESON: Nope! *He rollerblades away juggling dogs*
@SamanthaaaReece: Me: today I'm not apologizing for ANYTHING!!!!!! *almost steps on pigeon* Me: omg sorry sorry sorry