@pixelatedboat: Kids, if you want to succeed in journalism the way to do it is to suck at your job in a way that's useful to rich people
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@ABurgerADay: [Casting Meeting] Director: Did we get Cruise? Producer: Tom said he'll do it if we get Willis. Me: So we're Cruise in for a Bruce in?
@tastefactory: I don't get Roomba commercials. Like who spills an entire box of cereal on the floor and is like eh leave it for the robot to clean up