@Darlainky: Kids today will never know the joy of being selected to go outside to dust the erasers.
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@zachraffio: - Adele's baby starts to cry - Adele sings the baby a lullaby - baby cries more, but now for different reasons
@Jake_Vig: Picture someone you think is kinda/sorta attractive. Now picture them holding a pizza box.
@JustTashie: Welcome to twitter, the support group for people who like people who don't like people.
@carlyken: Hello 911 my son is a terrorist he won't eat AMERICAN cheese. Almost two. Yes I'll hold. Hello Child Protection Services my son is a terrori